Sunday, October 28, 2012
I remember many of the dreams I've had throughout my life. Some are terrible, but most of those that I remember were happy dreams.
For at least a decade, I don't think I've had any "good" dreams, the kind that leave you disappointed by the interruption of waking up. My dreams are anxiety-filled, confusing, serious, and full of confrontation. The settings and topics vary widely, but they are never, ever good dreams.
It's not that I have nightmares or night terrors. Those do come along, but infrequently. There was a time about six or seven years ago when I would often wake up during the night, terrified from a frightening dream, but eventually my mind calmed itself and those dreams stopped coming.
Sleep itself is a problem for me, but I know I've finally slept when I wake up from a dream. The dreams I have now--and I dream vividly every night--would best be described as dark, disturbing, and overwhelming in their detail.
I don't believe that dreams have representational or clairvoyant meaning, but I do think that dreams tell something about the mind of the dreamer. What do my unsettling, anxiety-filled dreams say about me? Maybe I'm just disturbed.