You call this a vacation?

On my to-do list for the next two weeks (seriously):

• dust and vacuum living room and dining room before painting
• sand the dozens of spackle spots in said rooms
• clear off the dining room table. Yikes.
• paint living/dining
• fix the vacuum cleaner
• try to fix the ceramic tabletop fountain
• rearrange powder room vanity
• declutter and clean the bedroom because it's awful, awful, awful
• iron about 300 pieces of clothing
• sort 300 pieces of clothing for give away
• work on two of the basement rooms. Possibly hopeless.
• clean out the car
• wash the car or get it washed
• perform self-surgery to remove skin tag under left arm
• maybe go to the art museum or the gardens
• get my hair trimmed
• dust and vacuum guest room in preparation for Mom's Labor Day visit
• fertilize houseplants
• think happy, peaceful, relaxing thoughts
• learn to accept that BP and chronic pain have irrevocably changed my life and that's just the way it is and will always be
• cook dinner most days to give Frank a break
• do PT exercises
• keep ironing
• think of ways to not feel so sad all the time
• try to banish suicide ideation
• try to understand the origins of despair
• go to the movies if I can find a movie that's not loud, violent, traumatizing, or depressing (note to self: skip "The Cove.")
• spend some time outside in the sunshine just enjoying it (I'm so fat, I'm too embarrassed to go for a walk during daylight hours)

And that's my two-week vacation plan.