First listen, then cut

They said it couldn't be done. the rumors had spread far and wide that May Voirrey was a living version of Cathy (of comic strip fame), never pleased with her hair. But that was never true.

I know that I can get a haircut I like because it has happened in the past. The problem is that good haircuts have been an elusive tease--get one, and the stylist leaves town, changes professions, or can never again repeat the cut the way it was the first time.

Therapy session, Friday. Barb tells me to try to see what I can control instead of feeling overwhelmed by what I can't. I take her advice of empowerment and I do what I do in the face of relationship breakups, job loss, and life crises: I drive to a salon I can afford, an inexpensive walk-in chain, and say, "I'd like a haircut, plus color. Maybe highlights?"

Cassie is young enough to be my daughter--I'm sure of it. She listens carefully as I explain that I can't seem to find a stylist who will cut my hair as short as I want it. I pull a photo out of my purse--the one here that I got from the Internet on About.com, I think--and I say, "This is the overall idea of what I want--but shorter because my hair grows really fast and I sweat a lot. I'd like a much more defined wedge in the back, and more layering for texture on the sides. The sides need to be shorter than this. Oh, and please don't do this to my bangs. I actually want my bangs longer and wispy. Where the hair meets the jaw, that should be a sharper angle and not so wispy or curly."

Cassie took the picture from my hand and asked a few clarifying questions. Then, she propped it up in front of the mirror. She had some ideas about color, and we decided on a warm red-brown with gold highlights. As Cassie worked, she checked in frequently to ask about small style details along the way.

After nearly three hours of coloring, cutting, and highlighting, my hair looked exactly like what I have wanted all along--for two years. The cut is perfect, the color is really pretty, and the highlights are good enough.

I look at my hair and I am happy.