What's that in dog years?

Looking back, I don't even know why I did it. I love quizzes. I love assessments. I was bored and I was procrastinating, and it was just...there.

What's your real age? See the shocking test used by Dr. Oz...Well, I like Dr. Oz and he seems credible. I just had a birthday but I really don't feel like I'm only two years away from the half-century mark.

The questions are mostly related to health, although there are a few about relationships. There are all of the things you expect like height, weight, health history, lifestyle, blah, blah, blah...It's a long test. After 15 minutes of answering questions, my "real" age was revealed.

Apparently, I'm 54.6 years old. That was sobering.

Here's why I'm almost seven years older than my chronological age:

• I'm too fat.
• I don't sleep enough.
• My stress level is too high.
• I take a lot of medications.
• I have poor social support.
• I don't know my cholesterol numbers (I do, but not having them at hand, I checked "low.")
• I do not exercise. At all.
• I have a mood disorder.

But hey, I look a lot younger than 48, so fuck the test. Everybody knows that in this culture, the only thing that matters is how you look (the younger the better), not how old you are or how long you live. There are no extra points for good health.